Warning, this post is so messy, it's just all the thought in my head typed out on a page. I'm super keen on vlogging, I love going out and filiming with my camera and editing videos. I love being creative. I don't have a crazy busy life so there's no way I'd do a daily vlog but when I go to events I like getting footage and editing it and choosing music to go with it and all that. I don't want people to be like "omg such a glam life", my life has very minimal glam haha I just want to have it as a diary/memory, kind of how I have my blog. I really like seeing what I posted a year ago and how things have changed and all that. Any time I get a new hobby I'm beyond excitied, my mind goes a billion miles per hour and has all these crazy creative ideas, it's like I can't keep up with my own imagination. If I'm so excited about vlogging, why aren't I doing it?
Why Vlogging freaks me out
1. I suck
My filiming and editing abilities are terrible, like honestly looks like it's a year 10 IT students final project that they only scored a C- on. Awkward. So I've made a few videos and edited them but haven't uploaded them because they literally suck, I'm not kidding. So, I suck, but I think I'm coming to terms with it. Does it really matter if I suck? I've gotta start somewhere, so why I can't start here without getting judged. My first photos from blogging sucked so maybe it's cool if my first couple of videos suck too? At least I'm doing something, at least I have a new hobby and am learning all these new IT skills?
2. Everyone is so good at Vlogging
I'm pretty content with my videos sucking but then I go on youtube and BAM, everyone has these stunning videos, perfectly edited with a minimum of 13k views. I know you're not supposed to compare yourself to others but there are no crappy vloggers anywhere, if you find one please link them to me to we can be friends.
3. I don't have a billion followers
It would be nice to just have a billion followers on instagram to have some kind of safety net to know that at least 20 people will watch my vlog and post nice things in the comments, but I only have 2000 followers on instagram, so maybe .5 of a person will watch my video? I guess it's not about how many people watch your video, it's more about the time and effort that goes into making the video and you should be happy doing what you want to do and shouldn't really care what others think.
To an extent, everyone cares about what others think. I barely get through the judgement of having a blog, not sure how I'd go with a vlog... I've considered waiting til I have 5000 instagram followers to start a vlog but I have all these groovy ideas and watch to start now haha I'm so impatient! Whenever I see that girls from school (who I haven't talked to in 10 years) or people from my last job have seen my insta-stories I just have a minor freak out and wonder what they think. Oh well, I can't control their thoughts!
I'm so over being freaked out
I legit want to eat a cake made out of rainbows and smiles (mean girls reference), I'm so over people judging other peoples hobbies. If you wanna be in a book club, you do you, I haven't picked up a book in over a month but if thats what your keen on, then do that. I'm probably just gonna get over my dumb fears and just start posting videos #yolo. If you're in the same boat as me pls message me so we can bond over our fears haha